Basics of Mindfulness

Many of you may have heard or read something about the benefits of mindfulness. There are many teachers available today that help people develop mindfulness. In fact, that is one of the main things I offer clients. So, let’s unpack what mindfulness is.

Mindfulness is the ability to be present with yourself. That doesn’t mean ignoring your emotions, thoughts, body sensations and beliefs, it means being aware of their presence and observing them with curiosity, non-judgment and compassion. Mindfulness is a form of having self-awareness, or understanding yourself better. It is the ability to be aware of what is happening internally, while paying attention to what is happening in your environment. The goal of mindfulness is to help you not get lost in your emotions, thoughts or beliefs where you react from them, but instead to notice when they arise and then develop an understanding of what they are trying to communicate, so that you can make an informed decision of how to respond in the present moment.

The reason to practice mindfulness, is because many of us have wounds we are or are not aware of from childhood or young adulthood, that when triggered, lead us to respond to the present moment as we responded in the past when we were younger. Although these coping skills were adaptive, and possibly helpful in childhood, at that time we did not have adult perspective. Therefore, those reactions are often not helpful to us in adulthood. By practicing mindfulness, you can interrupt the reactionary habitual responses that often do not actually lead to your needs being met, or your boundaries being respected. Practicing mindfulness helps you slow down, question your emotions and thoughts, and connect to a more helpful adult perspective. This enables you to better think through possible actions that might actually lead to the result you are seeking.

It is important to understand that it is not uncommon for individuals who are new to mindfulness, to experience symptoms of depression, anxiety and other mental health issues. This is because when you begin to listen to your inner world, you become aware of issues that have been under the surface that need healing. That is why for first time meditators and mindfulness practitioners, it is important to work with meditation and mindfulness coaches and therapists that are trauma informed. As a licensed marriage and family therapist who previously specialized in trauma, I understand how to support individuals who may experience distress when they are new to meditation and mindfulness. Despite this risk, the current neuroscience research on mindfulness and meditation shows that with long term practice, mental health symptom, either new or old, actually stabilize and lesson. There are also many other mental, emotional, and physical benefits to these practices.

I have written a book, called The Divine Within: healing ourselves to heal the world, which explores mindfulness, how our wounds develop in childhood, and how to use mindfulness to interrupt habitual reactions by tapping into your inner knowing and you inner divinity. By inner knowing and inner divinity, I mean being able to feel the difference in your body between the part of yourself that needs help because they are distressed, and your inner resources, which you will know because you will feel calm, curious, compassionate, and will want to use coping skills and behavior choices that cause the least amount of harm as a way of getting your needs met. This enables you to have more agency when responding to triggers in the present moment. I also work with clients to help them develop the tools offered in the book. Imagine having the ability to slow yourself down and think through the best course of action for any situation, tap into your inner knowing and inner divinity, instead of reacting on impulse from an emotion, which often leads to more conflict and internal discomfort.

If you are interested in learning more, please contact me at allison@blossomingheartwellness.com, follow me on social media, or sign up on my website under The Divine Within page to receive updates on my book.